Surefire Signs You Had Been A 2000s Gay Teen On Longer Island

Guaranteed symptoms You Were A 2000s Gay Teen On Long isle as told by our very own resident lengthy Island Lesbian,
Dayna Troisi.

Spray tans. MTV’s „Room Raiders.“ Having an inexplicable crush on Janis Ian. Piercing the language in somebody’s basement surrounded by grateful Bunny prints. Constantly caught between becoming emo and guidette. Obtaining pushed into lockers.

All of these circumstances constitute the strangely specific experience with being a homosexual teenager on
Lawng Isle
during the early 2000s. There was definitely one thing in water on
Extended Island
, since there are a lot more homosexuals than
nail salons
. I know this really is unbelievable, as suburbia is often a conventional wasteland, but that’s what they WANT you to imagine. The truth is, the audience is gay as hell. All my
and greatest friends tend to be queers through the isle of extended.

Therefore, if not one person more relates to this list, I know you spray-tanned, sauce-eating, fist-pumping gays will have it. Enjoy and please give your own graduating course and move my
insta handle
toward lesbians who escaped their unique hometowns to make over six figures now.

Listed below are 131 indicators that you were an extended isle
homosexual teenager
during the 2000s. Certainly, this number is actually loooong because we have been extra AF– our eyelashes and listings are hella long– they do not say „extended Island“ for nothing.


. You’d a GSA inside high-school

And you also stated you were only an „ally.“

2. You had gay cybersex in AOL nyc chatroom


3. You had a key Myspace page

Where you joined lesbian teams together with extreme interactions together with other queer adolescents littered across The united states.

4. You secretly watched
„The L Keyword“
and anxiously flipped returning to Nickelodeon any time you heard the mommy’s footsteps approaching

The reactions were on point together with the remote control.

5. You
this dark doll

Lengthy Island gays are always remarkable during sex due to these.

6. You were suspiciously effective in eating these

7. You thought the extended Island Medium would definitely see you inside the supermarket and out one to your whole household

8. Ugly
direct ladies
insisted you had a crush in it


9. You’d an all-consuming crush on a punk senior

Mine had a fohawk and dressed in security pins as earrings.

10. „The Perks to be A Wallflower“ rocked your own world

And also in that time, we swear we were



11. You wore
black colored lip stick

Because something being queer without subverting ~norms~?

12. You were darkly enthusiastic about Sylvia Plath

I am. I am. I’m. GAY.

13. Your own English teacher was your very best friend



14. Truth Or Dare was your favorite sleepover video game

You have not lived should you failed to just be sure to bribe your very best buddy into daring one to kiss the crush.

15. You were inexplicably turned on because of the noise of mac ‘n‘ mozzarella cheese being stirred

Acknowledge it.

16. You had an excellent homosexual child BFF

Which lowkey is actually too cool off individually now, works in style, and hangs out with a gaggle of right types.

17. You could potentiallyn’t determine whether you desired becoming Avril Lavigne or do the woman

a wrap looked dreadful on me, therefore I know that i simply wanted to rest along with her.

18. You used to be on the
softball group
, or you tend to be a timeless, unsporty lez anything like me, the tv series choir

19. You had been on the discussion staff

And constantly argued pro-choice.

20. You paid attention to Regina Spektor and Kate Nash

21. You sang a hidden monologue for the ability tv series

Mine got me dangling.

22. You had secret rendezvous in girls‘ bathroom

No kiss will ever compare well into the adventure of this senior school bathroom kiss.

23. You participated in „Day of Silence“

As an „ally,“ obviously.

24. You’re


frightened to be outed towards moms and dads

We came out to my mommy during the gyno, because We amazingly worried she’d tell my mother I had a LESBIAN pussy.

25. You’d no intercourse education and have now never ever utilized a
dental dam

Sorry to all or any you intercourse educator ladies just who visited Smith college or university. I assume you should never rest with an extended Island lez?

26. You went along to Warped concert tour or Bamboozle

And used Jac Vanek and TWLOHA jelly necklaces.

27. And asked group members from Cobra Starship to sign yourself elements

Gabe Saporta finalized my boob, and my mommy took out my personal AIM membership.

28. You watched homosexual shit on
and said it had been an accident and a college task

29. You got gigantic acrylic
because not homosexuality can get when it comes to a lengthy Island girl’s beauty regimen

Lesbian fail, but fashion winnings.

30. You stained squirt brown around some stylish lesbians sheets the first time you connected

Sorry about that.

31. You self


had intercourse inside bra since you were putting on a bombshell push up bra from Victoria’s key

All our tits seemed two dimensions bigger than they truly were ‚cause of those stupid bras. I happened to be a 36E with one, and I also looked like a demented pervy comic strip.

32. You seriously wanted to be on
Jersey Shore

33. You didnot have to rest to attend a lady’s house

The one thing that makes it far more easy to grow up

34. House functions happened to be full of underground homosexual debauchery

The basement is where the homosexual shit happens.

35. You looked to find out if your own ring finger was longer than your own pointer thumb to find out if perhaps you were truly a lesbian

Since you heard it you secretly saw „The L keyword.“

36. Or got „was I gay?“ quizzes

We unequivocally realized I was gay at 13 yrs . old because Quizilla told me I became.

37. You


homosexual content thereon dark colored internet site
Ebaums World

38. Whenever youtube was formulated, you sweatily searched „girls kissing“ on your family’s pc in the evening

Which directed to…

39. You installed porn to Quicktime (this is pre-Pornhub, youngins!)

40. You had to
bring some guy to prom
, yet still slept with a female that evening

41. You physically fought somebody who flirted along with your girlfriend one or more times

You are not from Long Island for those who haven’t punched your ex partner in the face at Pride.

42. You’re hopelessly in love with a
directly girl
exactly who skateboarded

43. You had to go to „religion course“

The emphasize of my senior high school profession ended up being getting fingered within the chapel restroom.

44. „everything She stated“ by t.A.T.u. had been your shit

45. You smoked smoking cigarettes within coastline in cold weather inside vehicle

And believed you’re thus cool and alt.

46. You drove 20 minutes or so to attend the drive-thru Dunkin‘

Even though there seemed to be a walk-in one right down the block.

47. You drove a couple of hours attain Sonic in nj-new jersey

When you haven’t caught on, there actually wasn’t a lot to accomplish.

48. You drove as your sole source of enjoyable

Are you presently noticing a pattern right here?

49. You kept reading about LIGALY while understanding you’d rather perish than step base in LIGALY

Also loser closeted teenagers on lengthy Island have actually requirements. We planned to celebration in a dark dance club, not eat stale donuts in a community center.

50. You possessed a Ryan Cassata CD

You purchased as he checked out your GSA.

51. You h

ad a crush on a woman just who decided to go to a catholic college

52. You „hated“ your own mother but spent everyday along with your mommy

The family codependency is genuine.

53. You missed junior prom

We invested junior prom eating at warm’s making use of the additional gays.

54. You centered so hard on the floor within the locker room you practically dropped over

God forbid a female believes you are looking at her education bra.

55. Will Likely Die If You Don’t Sporting Converse

56. You drew tattoos throughout yourself (because slicing was too serious)

We had been also sheltered and sensitive to cut.

57. You visited Hot Topic after that kept because you got unnerved

Because there ended up being constantly a hot dyke working within sign-up, however just weren’t edgy enough for her.

58. However you had been additionally too scared to go into Abercrombie or Hollister

Since it was actually dark and smelly inside — and because you had been significantly drawn to the softball lez greeting teens at the home.

59. And that means you ordered rainbow


regarding DL at Spencer’s

60. „Hairstyles associated with Damned“ rocked the world

Every queer child peruse this throughout the bus.

61. So performed „The Catcher For The Rye“

Therefore, you turned into teacher’s pet.

62. You confided inside pet dog, pet, or hamster

because nobody more ~got you~

63. You had close friends necklaces from Claire’s with a lady you finished up internet dating

64. You published committing suicide notes as a spare time activity

With zero goal of ever soon after through, you merely like, required the *release.*

65. You have an incredibly morbid, dark colored, and politically wrong sense of humor

See 64.

66. It’s not possible to stand Personal Justice Warriors.

Long Islanders don’t have any patience for buzzwords.

67. You entirely are unlearning your entire f*cked right up prejudices, however.

Becoming gay does not allow you to exempt from that.

68. You had been enthusiastic about 3oh!3.

Inform your sweetheart, if he says he is had gotten beef, that I’M A VEGAN, AND I AIN’T F*CKING SCARED OF HIM.

69. You read to flee a grim fact, but you only wound up checking out publications about younger gay kids getting hate-crimed in any event

Or you were hate-crimed for being a loser just who checks out.

70. You use „hate criminal activity“ as a colloquialism.

71. You bought

a „gay street“ sign up the industry day at the metropolis

And hid it inside closet.

72. You hung a delight banner inside locker and took a Myspace photo with-it

73. You had a DeviantArt account

Mine regrettably nevertheless exists.

74. You believed really seriously that you get in touch with Matthew Shepard and Laramie Wyoming while having nothing at all in accordance with the exception of being gay

And you starred in „The Laramie venture,“ guided by the strange drama teacher.

75. You made insensitive jokes about „The Laramie venture“ as if you weren’t chuckling, you had been weeping.

My personal best friend and I also nonetheless get hysterical whenever we state „the shining lighting of Laramie.“

76. You experience your yearbook and guessed who you believed was gay as well

77. You’re in a love-hate commitment along with your music educators

78. You significantly seemed the actual bus screen when it rained

79. You knew every line to hire

NO DAY simply TODAY.

80. You played 7 Minutes In eden at an all-girls sleepover


81. You remember getting thus seriously troubled you’ren’t invited towards all-girls sleepover in which you’re CERTAIN they played 7 Minutes In Heaven


82. You pretended to get afraid during scary films to put on your friend’s hand

Oldest technique into the book, ladies.

83. You ate your sorrows in Elio’s Pizza as soon as you got residence from softball rehearse

The actual fact that there had been 10 amazing pizzerias in a two-mile radius in your home.

84. You had a Nextel walkie talkie telephone

Tegan and Sara
ended up being the religion

86. P!nk

ended up being your own misunderstandings

Missundaztood nevertheless slaps.

87. You drastically cried inside bed room paying attention to „Family Portrait“

Though your house life was actually pretty amazing as well as your mom was a student in your kitchen producing sauce while the father was strolling your dog you ~swore~ you had eliminate.

88. You carried a skateboard around but couldn’t actually skate

89. You carried smokes around but didn’t in fact smoke

We pushed my personal ex to hold cigarettes every-where to look tough.

90. You did almost anything to prevent fitness center course

Fortunately, I have a disability. Other gays was required to find out more creative.

100. You said you had been bi

You happened to be actually gay because time is actually very long.

101. You decided to go to
Flames Isle
every summer without actually knowing it was actually homosexual middle

HOW did I maybe not understand I found myself thus near to numerous dykes?

102. You totally understood exacltly what the health teacher was actually making reference to whenever she spoken of their roommate

I got the greatest crush back at my health teacher.

103. You wore rainbow sweatbands


104. You invested vacations drinking around dirty workout equipment in another person’s basement

You had beenn’t cool enough to drink in parking lots and that means you drank alongside your mom’s Gazelle.

105. You obsessively curated your own myspace top 8

106. You diverted the eye from yourself by making enjoyable of somebody otherwise in the locker space


107. You begged the mommy to get you shit from advertisements

108. You binged on horrible treats like Cosmic Brownies and Kool-Aid after school

109. You played those Barbie dress-up games online so you might simply take their own clothes off

You filthy perv.

110. You corrupted your next-door neighbors through each of their Sims flirt with girls

111. You kissed girls as a „game“ because you had been „acting“

112. You watched „men Don’t Cry“ because only homosexual material in GSA and had been frightened back to the dresser slightly

113. Then you definitely watched „But i am a Cheerleader“ and got a lot more afraid

114. If you’re lucky, you had one
queer aunt
whom lived-in NYC and offered you hope.

115. You intensely masturbated to MTV songs films

I’ll never forget the first time We noticed the „Genie In a container“ movie.

116. The cool women which bullied you now have numerous kids and work with a



Hey! i am aware we haven’t discussed in a bit. Just how have you been girl?! was actually wanting to know if you were contemplating learning more info on Mary Kay?

117. You saw „Next“ making use of the doorway closed given that it had been a bisexual occurrence


118. You snuck peeks of titties through 18+ section of the video shop

119. You saw Scrambled Porn Channel on station 99

120. You practiced the heartbreak to be on shopping center and seeing direct couples holding fingers and feeling like that will never be you

121. You got away with making in the hallway considering that the teachers don’t wish to be accused of dislike crime-ing you

122.  You w

atched „Donnie Darko“ with queer artwork young ones and


to think its great to squeeze in

The F*CK ended up being with that film?

123. You published we <3 **** on the notebooks

Since you had been also afraid to actually create your own crush’s title.

124. You appreciated „Twilight“

Or believed a smug sense of superiority for hating it.

125. You had crippling anxiousness on
Nationwide Developing Time

126. You actually believed driving a car of goodness in the event your moms and dads talked-about homosexual men and women

127. You burnt CDs with custom playlists for females you had crushes on

128. You dated a woman with an eating condition

129. You dated a girl while having your own personal eating condition but hers had been worse you needed to pay attention to that

Told you Long Islanders have actually unsuitable senses of wit.

130. You used men’s


to attract the


131. You it seems that have actually most repressed injury, and you are realizing it you are causeing this to be list

But you can’t stop cackling along with your companion whom you survived everything with.